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Course in Relationship Miracles: Lesson 19

"My good comes from one source only
and I am staying in-touch with that source!"

Many people think that flirting is a harmless pastime. But I want to look deeper and see what flirting really is and what it implies.

Inside myself I know exactly what I really want. My spirit knows what is right for me at any given moment, whether it be a particular job, car, living circumstance, spiritual path, relationship, or anything else.

My ego, on the other hand, wants to sample this and sample that, dabble a little here and there, etc., on the secret premise that (keep this a secret) maybe a greener pasture will be discovered or maybe there is something better to be had over and above what my spirit knows about.

In other words, flirting is a deliberate attempt by my ego to ignore what I know to be true in my spirit. Although disguised as a harmless attempt to incur an "added experience", flirting is actually an ego attempt to ignore the source of my true happiness and, if carried far enough, will destroy my happiness.

If a man flirts with a hundred and one half-baked teachers, for example, when he is being guided by his heart and soul to one particular fully enlightened teacher, he is sabotaging his spiritual success, true or false?

If a woman flirts with a dozen career choices when she is being guided by everything deep inside herself to one particular career, she is slowing herself down and delaying her ultimate happiness no matter how much fun she thinks she is having along the way, true or false?

When a visitor from outer space flirts with 50 or 60 different fascinating worlds instead of staying on track with the mission plan, what can be said about the visitor's respect for the plan?

What can be said about the possible success of anyone who does not respect the plan in any area of endeavor?

It may not be evident at first glance, but if I give myself permission to look the issue straight in the eye and call a spade a spade I see that flirting is a blatant form of self-dishonesty (my ego giving my spirit the finger, if I need a picture).

No matter how much my ego counsels that flirting is "harmless fun" or "healthy checking out of possibilities", I want to train my mind to look deeper inside and find what is true happiness and what are the possibilities that my spirit is saying are truly mine to pursue.

The solution to seemingly harmless but actually self-destructive flirting is simple, although it may take some training to become a master. All I have to do is ask myself every time I'm tempted, "Is this what I really, really, really, really, really want?"

Half the time just asking this question will have me stopping in my tracks. The other half the time this question will at least have me slowing down and looking deeper inside. The question "Is this what I really, really, really, really, really want?" is like a spiritual highway patrol officer radar-checking a road the ego would rather race down at breakneck speed without getting caught.

This week I simply want to train myself to be a highway patrol officer working for my spirit, in a manner of speaking.

Each morning when I awaken I will say to myself a few times, until I really begin to believe it:

"Today I am not going to let my ego get away with flirting."

Then I spend a few minutes in meditation each morning,letting my subconscious mind give me pictures of situations I might encounter during the day where I would be tempted to flirt. With each picture that comes to mind, I also see myself hesitating and asking myself:

"Is this what I really, really, really, really, really want?"

Then throughout the day I will actively watch for and identify temptations to flirt, responding to each temptation with the same flirtation-slowing question:

"Is this what I really, really, really, really, really want?"

If I ask this question enough during the day, by the end of the day I should be feeling better about myself than ever before.

Prior to sleeping I again take time for meditation during which I ask for the feeling of what it feels like to totally not flirt. After I have felt this feeling fully, I ask for the feeling that is felt while flirting. Then I shift back and forth a few times feeling first the one feeling then the second, and comparing the two.

What does ego guidance feel like? What does it feel like to be totally in-touch with my spirit and my spirit's guidance?

Before falling asleep I thank my lucky stars that I am evermore in-touch with my spirit instead of my ego. I might say a few times to myself the statement of this week's lesson:

"My good comes from one source only and I'm staying in-touch with that source!"

Also available free of charge online:
Course in Political Miracles

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